I am sure you have seen the uproar that surrounded the finale of the show The Biggest Loser. In case you are unfamiliar with the show, they essentially take 15+ contestants who are morbidly obese and help them to shed jaw dropping amounts of weight over the course of 16 weeks – and even compete over who can lose the largest percentage of weight. The final three then get to go home for a few weeks before reappearing live on the grand finale for one final weigh in and the chance to win $250,000.
This season’s winner, a contestant named Rachel, had become one of the shows “favorites” with her bright beautiful smile, amazing determination, and champions spirit. She won the Biggest Loser Triathalon to secure her spot in the finale as America cheered. At the live finale, everyone anxiously awaited her grand debut. What we saw however was jaw dropping – as the show is known for – but this time out of concern and fear for her health more than admiration and applause. Rachel had lost so much weight that her features appeared sunken in, her bones protruded, and she looked downright frail… Rachel was down to 105 pounds – a 155 pound weight loss in less than seven months.
The uproar was immediate – Twitter all but exploded and the trainers Facebook pages became inundated with both nasty messages and messages of real concern. People questioned her health, insinuated an eating disorder, blamed the show, blamed the trainers…
For me however, it was like an epiphany.
For the last year I have been focused on my weight, and I have let it control a huge part of my life. You will know what the scale said in the morning based on whether I am happily bouncing around or walking around looking like I could kick the cat. I have worked my body out to total exhaustion – literally making myself sick. I have worked out to the point that I would rather have someone else brush my teeth than to have to raise my aching arms that high. I have been grouchy beyond measure because I was either hungry or mentally tearing myself down because I had indulged on a meal that I knew wasn’t the healthiest choice. I have eaten enough grilled chicken to make my worry I might sprout feathers.
In short – I have been completely miserable, given myself an unhealthy body image, and shattered a good bit of my self esteem.
For what!?
One of the common complaints I saw on Facebook was from Moms who were watching the finale with their teenage daughters, and they quickly changed the channel to make sure their daughters did not see people celebrating and rewarding such a sickly looking frame. I – watching with both of my daughters and Mike – instead turned it into a discussion about how the scale truly doesn’t matter. And we all collectively agreed that none of us ever – EVER – want to be that thin.
My hope is that Rachel will re-emerge in a few weeks having put back on about 20 pounds of lean, healthy muscle mass. In my eyes she is still very much a champion, and maybe even more so than the others because she clearly did what she needed to do to secure her winnings – possibly at the expense of her health. But to me, the concept of the show is to blame for that – not the trainers, and not Rachel. She is a competitor, and she knows what it takes to win.
As for me, it is time to give it a rest. I have taken off my FitBit. I have put my scale in the garage. I have turned off MyFitnessPal.
I know what choices I need to make to be healthier, and I know what makes me feel good, and what makes me feel bad. My focus will be more on the former than the latter – and not on the number on the scale – but also to quit worrying so damn much. No more obsessing. No more exhaustion. No more beating myself up.
For months I have been staring at the same couple of numbers on the scale – hating myself a little more each day because the number has not changed – no matter what I have done. However watching that finale, I realized that I will never be as committed as Rachel was… and that is perfectly okay.
So Thank you Biggest Loser for giving me some perspective.
Sarah @ Play 2 Learn with Sarah says
I watched the finale a day later…after hearing all the uproar. The look on the trainers faces was utter surprise and concern. I too hope that Rachel is able to come out of this healthier and happier.
I am also glad that you’ve found inspiration here…because that what the show is really meant to do (although I will admit it makes me hungry to watch the show and I usually end up eating through it.)
You are perfect! You have more drive than 99% of the people I know and I would bet that once you stop focusing on it and just make it part of your life…you’ll achieve even more!
Kelly Stilwell says
Amen and amen. Why do we do this to ourselves? I am inspired. Thank you.
Tammy says
For her ht she should be 108-132. I think she looks great. The thing is, America is so accustomed to heavier people that when a person is where they should be- they start immediately with “you’re too skinny.” When I was at my lowest wt- but still in the wt parameter, I was getting those comments. But I felt great, I was eating healthy, I was exercising, I wasn’t sick.
IF we were a PHYSICAL WORKING world and not computer/phone/iPad/iPod/xbox/wii/tv crazed people or had to be physical to live and survive…. We would all be a lot “Skinnier.”
Granted, I know there are unrealistic number crazed people…. But actually, we all could be a little more attuned to our numbers.
And for those of us who sit and watch the biggest loser- kudos to Rachel!
Karen says
Well written Lynsey!! It gets all too consuming! I have finally tried to say no to dieting altogether and make reasonable choices. I’m never going to be waif thin… Don’t want to be…You are beautiful, funny and a great writer! That is all that matters!! 😉
Summer Davis says
Holy cow, Lynsey. You just made me cry. I am so happy for you that you see the light. It is what I have been telling you all along. You are SO sexy and SO beautiful. Keep making healthy choices for your life for the sake of being healthy. Not for a number on the scale.
Jenn says
I think the root of this is an addictive personality. Food was the addiction for most of them. Now for some of them, exercise and/or getting the number on the scale to go down is the addiction.
Crystal Green says
As a fellow woman who deals with the scale not moving regardless what I do/don’t do I can fully relate to this post. I’m glad that you found a new peace of mind. I am currently obese, and unless I go on medicine I can’t afford I won’t be able to lose this excessive weight because of health reasons beyond my control.
However, even prior to that, my Mom raised me up on a very strict diet and we literally lived on “a diet.” She would ONLY buy diet food and she got concerned when she gained even two pounds. It made me VERY rebellious against that type of life. When I did move out, I went crazy and ended up gaining 100 pounds. What I didn’t know was that was going to cause my hormone imbalance to kick in full steam ahead, and I’d never be able to lose it. My mom didn’t bother telling me about those possible issues when I was growing up.
She stressed more about physical appearance and how society was going to view me and treat me. She always came across as overly vain. When she was in her final years of her life and became so thin that she literally couldn’t find a single thing to wear in any store. We actually ended up having that heart to heart talk that we should of had a long time ago.
Sorry for the long response, but this is what I thought of when I read this wonderfully well written blog post. You sound like a woman who will do what it takes naturally now to lose whatever weight you’re trying to lose without having it be the center of your world. Truth be told, that will definitely lead to better results.
Lucero @We Are Earthformed says
Lynsey, what a wonderful way to take such a controversial and polarizing event and turning it into a positive experience for you and your family. Thanks for sharing your heartfelt personal experience with weightloss and fitness goals. I can very much identify with where you are coming from.
Cayce says
Proud of you. Love you. 🙂
Susan says
Thank you Lynsey. Very well said!
Leah says
Good post. I agree she is on the too thin side and truly think 10lbs would look better. But I also think she has a very small frame too that has been hidden by so much fat.
At any rate, for me, I have my goal and it’s not necessarily to be thin as much as I know I have 100lbs to lose. But I don’t obsess about it anymore. Growing up, I was anorexic and dropped down to a 101 lbs. on a 5’5″ person, you can imagine how bad that looked. But it wasn’t enough and I started making myself puke. I got help, gained weight back, but still very much struggled with it. Until I met my husband. He is the first person I have ever felt loved me for me. Loved my personality, loved the things I was into and he loved me no matter what my weight was. When I met him was also when I had stopped competitively swimming so I gained weight and he never cared at all.
So trying to lose weight now is for me to be healthy. For me, my husband, the only person I care about what his opinion of me is, has seen me relatively close to my lowest weight Nd he’s seen me at my highest weight.
Sorry I totally rambled lol oh and I only use my fitness pal to keep track of the pounds lost. I figure, when I lose 100 lbs, I want to be able to look back over the weeks and months it took me and see in black in white where I was and where I got to so I don’t go back.
Jason says
Thank you for this post. I agree with you completely. I run a non-profit that provides healthy lifestyle education to help combat obesity. I listen to thousands of people’s stories of their stuggles and you have the right perspective. You know what makes you feel healthy and that is what it important.
As far as Rachel goes, the issue it not with her. This is part of her journey and I am proud of her for making changes. The issue is with the show and the message it sends out. Already on our site, someone has said, “This is why people (INCLUDE ME) think it is good to lose fast…this is why I get discouraged about my weight, and want to give up!”
For every person that makes incredible changes on that show, there are 100 people watching that get discouraged because they work their ass off and only see 1 or 2 pounds lost in a week. The truth is, 1 to 2 pounds a week is healthy, sustainable weight loss. That is the message that needs to be preached…not one of completely unrealistic weight-loss for the average person. The show is doing more harm than good for the masses because it sets an impossible bar that discourages most people instead of encouraging them.